


Not So Long

by HCKYGRL72



Series: Droughtlander Survival Series [13]
Category: Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: F/M, Goodbye Sex, Romance, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-12
Updated: 2015-04-12
Packaged: 2018-03-22 13:16:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3730327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HCKYGRL72/pseuds/HCKYGRL72
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set in TV universe - Outlander<br/>Episode 110 - The Pricking of My Own Thumbs</p><p>So departure from the books, in the TV show Jamie is now leaving because he's ordered to.</p><p>That changes the dynamic a lot for their relationship. </p><p>I thought there should be a scene where Jamie tells Claire he had to leave. How does Claire react to this? </p><p>So this is written between the scene with Colum, Dougal, Jamie & Ned ordering them to go and the next morning when Claire & Jamie are in the courtyard. Told from Jamie's perspective....</p><p>Hope you enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not So Long

I gingerly walked down the steps away from Colum’s rooms. I watched Dougal’s slumped shoulders as he stepped down each step. Neither of us were happy regarding Colum’s orders. Both of us were having to leave the women we cared for. _Gellis might be a mad and evil witch, but it was clear Dougal was enamored of the lady_ , I thought to myself. I could not fault my uncle for his love. And now Gellis was carrying Dougal’s child, and Colum was sending him away. This gave me pause.

My mind whirled back to finding Claire on the fairy hill, clutching the dead child to her breast, tears fresh upon her face. _Aye, Claire is a kind woman_. She will be a wonderful mother, fierce and loving to the children she will bear. _What if Claire is carrying my bairn right now, both of us unaware of her condition?_ , Jamie thought, his brow furrowing with concern. With Colum sending me with Dougal, I will be far from her, unable to share in that joy. I cursed Dougal and his machinations, they were always pulling me into schemes I’d rather not be involved. And now, all I want to do was return to Lallybroch, forget about the past years; Take up my rightful position as Laird of Broch Turauch, begin my life anew with Claire, raise my family far away from my uncles. It had been so for my parents. They had been happy away from intrigues at Castle Leoch. And so it would be for Claire and I.

Dougal paused where the corridor branched in two directions.

“I will meet ye in the courtyard at first light.” Dougal stated solemnly to Jamie. Colum’s orders had been clear, he was to stay by his uncle’s side to ensure Colum’s orders where followed. The laird had been clear that Dougal was not to see Gellis Duncan before they left. I went to speak, but Dougal stopped me.

“I ken what you’re about to say, lad. Ye tend to ye business and I shall tend to mine.” The tone of Dougal’s voice allowed for no argument. I nodded gently, clutching my side as a pain shot through it.

“Aye. First light.” I agreed as I moved toward the corridor that would take me to the bed chambers I shared with Claire. I watched as Dougal walked away, the man had lost much this day, I was inclined to allow him some measure of comfort. I sighed as I walked with a heavy heart knowing tonight would be the last night with my beautiful Claire for many nights to come.

 _I dinna like the idea of having to leave her here alone, for many reasons, but mostly because I enjoyed having Claire by my side_ , Jamie thought. Our reconciliation was so fresh, I worried a long separation would render that reconciliation asunder. My heart clenches just thinking of that time when they were at odds, how I thought I had lost her due to my stubbornness. And yet we had found a way back to each other, I smiled at the thought of two weeks past when we had reunited. Yet, it wasn’t just the physical passion we shared for each other, it was the way we speak about so many things. It always surprises me the ideas Claire comes up with; her quick mind helping him sort out things, see things differently. And yet, I still feel she keeps secrets from me. I had resigned to the fact that perhaps over time she would yield all her secrets into my safekeeping. I dinna care what they were, I will forgive her no matter what they are.

I reached the door to the bed chamber, I stood outside, my hand on the latch. It was late, but I could hear Claire moving about, undoubtedly preparing for bed. I closed my eyes listening to her soft humming as she went about her absolutions for retiring for the night. I had caught her humming a few times before, melodies I had never heard before but pleasant in their rhythm. I remember asking her about them and seeing her eyes cloud over a bit like she didn’t or couldn’t explain what they were without revealing something. She smiled and explained she didn’t really know the words, just that her wayward uncle would hum them while he worked. It was the truth, but not the full truth, I knew.

I softly raised the door latch, careful to make as little noise as possible. It always stole my breath to see Claire sitting before the mirror in her shift, brushing her hair. Our eyes caught in the mirror, and she smiled softly at me. The vision gave me such a jolt, like lightning running through my body, it was as if I had seen this before but it was different. It both confused and terrified me in that moment. Seeing my distress, Claire stopped brushing and turned towards me.

“Jamie? What is it?” Claire asked her soft eyes gazing warmly at me with concern. I blinked a few times to clear my vision and my head of the feeling, focusing on Claire. Claire rose from her seat walking toward me, standing me in front of the hearth.

“It is your wound? Let me check it.” Claire asked but preceded to move my clothing in attempt to check my recent injury. She had my stock and hauberk off quickly before I could respond.

“No, Sassenach. My wound is fine. Well, fine as can be expected.” I responded with a winch. Claire pulled back away from me, gazing up at me. Her eyes filled with concern at my troubled countenance.

“Something’s happened. What?” Claire asked expectantly, her hands resting lightly on my hips. I took a deep breath, unsure how to begin.

“Come sit down before you fall down.” Claire led me to the overstuffed chair near the hearth. I sat gingerly, slowly easing myself into the soft chair. Being favored by the laird had its advantages I thought as I took in the lavish room we had occupied for the past month. But at what price would we be required to pay for such advantages, I thought?

Claire preceded to remove my boots and I exhaled at the lovely attention. My eyes strayed to the bed. Mrs. Fitz, ever the romantic, had taken upon herself to have the staff refresh the garlands of flowers around our bed every few days. Traditionally bride and groom were allowed a few days alone to…get acquainted with each other. Our marriage on the road hadn’t allowed for that. And our subsequent discord over my disciplining Claire had dampened any amorous recreations even further. However, I smiled watching Claire pull one boot off then the next, we had made up for that lost time. I closed my eyes remembering the taste of Claire upon my lips just the other morning.

So absorbed in my musings of our past lovemaking, I dinna noticed Claire rising from the floor until her hand touched my head softly, her fingers combing through the unruly mass of hair there.

“Here…” Claire whispered handing me a glass of whiskey. I thanked her kindly in Gaelic. She will have to learn Gaelic soon, I thought, for her protection as well as for my pleasure. I took a long draw from the glass enjoying the fiery burn down my throat. Claire casually perched her hip on the arm of my chair, my arm naturally curving around her soft body pulling her closer to me.

“Alright, spill it. What’s happened?” Claire demanded somewhat playfully, her hand gently resting on my shoulder in encouragement. I glanced up at my wife of little over a month. How could I tell her I had to leave her, now, for an unknown amount of time? What if her reaction was not what I expect? What if she is no upset about our parting as I am?

“Colum has ordered Dougal back to his holdings to see to his wife’s burial.” I stated directly, taking another draw from the glass of whiskey. I grimaced a bit at the burn, setting the glass on the table nearby. “And Dougal is to remain there until Colum summons him back to Leoch.”

“Well, that’s not surprising. Dougal should be attending to that. And a bit of time away from Gellis might clear everyone’s head, although I think it’s a bit too late for that.” Claire stated with a soft chuckle, her hand once again softly combing through my wild hair, stroking it behind my ears gently. Her touch, however benign, was heavenly to me. I reached up and grasped Claire’s hand to stop her administrations, clutching her hand to my chest as I looked up at her solemnly.

“Colum sends me as well, to attend to Dougal and ensure Colum’s orders are followed.” I stated directly, “And you are to stay here at Leoch.” I silently rejoicing seeing the look of shock wash over my Claire’s face, her eyes flare with concern.

“What?! Why can’t I go with you?” Claire asked expectantly, her hand shaking a bit as I held it. I could see Claire’s concern regarding her requirement to stay here was perhaps my idea.

“Colum wishes to guarantee I am focused on ensuring HIS orders are followed. And I fear he is also punishing me as well.” I looked away thinking of Colum’s rage. “Colum knows well….my feelings…regarding being parted from ye.”

“How long will you gone?” Claire asked her voice shaking.

“For as long as Colum desires….” I stated looking up at Claire, who pressed her lips together tightly. I could see the shine in her eyes as she looked away nodding in understanding. I could no tell if it was sadness or anger that made her eyes blaze or her chin quiver slightly in the firelight. The sight both pained me and made me rejoice.

Before I could sooth her, Claire stood and moved away, her back to me. I dinna follow her straightaway. I watched for a bit as the firelight played along the lines of Claire’s lithe body through the fabric of her shift. My desire grew as I watched her. I desired her. The wanting of my wife never stopped it seemed, and now the eminent threat of a length parting drove my desire swiftly. I moved quietly, removing the last remnants of my clothing, careful of the fresh bandage around my mid-section.

I walked up behind Claire, who stood at the foot of the bed with one hand resting on the bedpost as she seemed to silently contemplated the information I had just imparted. I placed my hand on over hers on the bedpost, the other around her waist, pulling her up against me. With her free hand, she gently stroked me from hip to thigh, feeling my nakedness against her still clothed body. I nuzzled my mouth lightly along Claire’s shoulder and up her neck.

“I leave at first light, mo nighean don.” I whispered into the shell of her ear. I felt, more than heard, the gasp leave her body at the news of my imminent departure. Her hand clutched my thigh fiercely, I pressed my cock against her backside. I slowly pulled Claire’s shift down her body, pooling softly at her feet at the edge of our bed. Claire pressed herself back against me, my hands running up her stomach, stoking her breasts. I left the gooseflesh as it washed over Claire’s body as I touched her, hardening her nipples. Our mouths mated with fierce desire as I clutched Claire’s throat possessively, pressing myself against her luscious bottom. I wanted to be inside her so violently. Claire seemed to sense my desire, she moved forward toward the bed, my arms loosening their hold on her to allow her to move. I thought she would climb up on the bed, but she placed one knee on bed as she bend over and forward over the bed. The view she present would make any man randy as a rutting stag, let alone one who may not see his wife for several weeks.

I dinna have to be told what Claire wanted. Aye, I wanted this as well. I moved swiftly entering Claire’s slick tight opening from behind. Our gasps at our mutual joining mixing with the sound of the fire behind us. I moved gently at first, but Claire moved as well driving me to a quicker and more frantic pace. I could feel Claire responding as I moved within her and the feeling drove me to drive harder and faster into her body. Claire clutched the bedpost with her hand, bracing herself against my punishing onslaught of desire. Her cries of pleasure driving me to possess her. My hands clutched at her hips, pulling her against me, I ran my hands up her back to her shoulders, grasping them with feverish abandon. Claire’s back arched as she cried out my name.

“Yes! Yes! Ohhh! Ohhh….yes, Jamie! Jamie!”

I clutched at Claire’s hair as I pounded against her. All I could do was react to the unmistakable feeling of oblivion that approached. Our souls called out to one another in that moment. I could feel myself becoming one with Claire in that moment. I bent forward as the feeling of utter completeness washed through my body, my head resting on Claire’s shoulder as my body convulsed in spasms deep with her welcoming body.

I was aware that we had both half collapsed on the bed, still joined as my seed continued to stream into my wife’s body. My feet still touched the floor, but I wasn’t sure how I remained standing. I brushed my lips against Claire’s neck and back, tasting the salty sweetness of our exertions on my tongue. I could feel the trembling of Claire’s body as we lay there. I went to move away.

“Don’t go. Stay.” Claire whispered. I was no sure if her words meant now or later, but I remained where I was.

Slowly though, I moved us more onto the bed, lying spoon fashion, legs dangling over the edge. I wrapped my arms around Claire, who in turned held my arms against her.

“Are you disappointed that we didn’t do that on our wedding night as you had thought?” Claire asked, her tone bring voice to the sexy smile upon her face. I laughed into her neck as I stroked her hip lightly.

“Ahhh, if we had done that the first time, I doubt I would have done it any other way moving forward, ye wee vixen.” I replied as I scraped my teeth roughly against Claire’s shoulder. I realized early on that Claire was different from other women in the bedroom. She was not afraid of the fierceness I felt at times when I desired her. I was thankful for that. To have a woman respond to me and desire me so seemed something rare indeed.

And now, I must leave her.

My silence caught my lover’s attention.

“What are you thinking?” Claire asked softly as she stroked my arms, her face turned away from me.

“I was thinking….no…I was trying to remember you. Commit the feeling of your body against mine to memory so when I am alone....” I paused then I kissed Claire’s back softly. Claire turned towards me. Her face showed her concern but also something else. Was it love, I thought, as she gazed up at me? She stroked my face softly, I, in turn, did the same.

It was Claire who broke the silence.

“It will not be so long.” Claire stated hopefully as she ran her hand down my chest to rest over my heart. I clutched her hand over my heart and smiled softly at her.

“Aye. Not so long.”

It was a promise to each other, we both knew. No matter how long it was, one day we would be back together. And that would be not so long at all.


End file.
